I was the kid that tiptoed into the pool, but dove into the ocean.

Two INXXs

How did you know?

Because you can just tell. What are you saying you couldn't tell when something was weird with me?

I could.

See?

Yeah I know. I could see that you could see. Could you see that I could see that you could see?

(^This is what happens when two INXXs finally have real talks).

What was in your mind, when you found yourself standing at the edge of something you once thought was endless?

The third time some scammers called my phone today I pressed "1" to be connected and just started meowing.

If you know me in person, you might already know that my weird talent is that I can meow eerily realistically.

"Be the change you want to see in the world." - Unknown

Remember, 'being' doesn't rely on other people seeing.

The biggest problem with people who say their "biggest problem" or "toxic trait" is being too selfless, is never that they're too selfless.

Power Out

I don't want to say too much about this. Writing can be the means that you go deep, but depending on the circumstances after a point you may begin to dig your own grave.

The central electric wire is out, and there is about one-hundred percent humidity in the house. Dread hangs in the air, as I am suddenly forced to face the most difficult task of my life. One I have been putting off for ten years, because it'll force me to relive every bit of trauma that once dragged me under and threatened to never let me up for air.

It's hard to breathe.The biggest problem with people who say their "biggest problem" or "toxic trait" is being too selfless, is never that they're too selfless.

And it is one of those nights that each person has at some point in their life when it is truly impossible to sleep, even for other reasons best not mentioned.

Backed up against a wall, after a point there is only one thing you can do: do your best with the hand you've been dealt.

So I boil some water to wash my hair, and throw on my nightrobe and some lofi radio and get to work under the impending morning's odd medium blue.

Taking Intro to Psych

So much of studying for intro to psychology is just learning technical words/vocab for things that are obvious.

I hope that someday I can take another psych class. If things were different, I really would have liked to be a psychologist.

Recent Graphics

Since I'm now in college and my mom's not going to put my homework and drawings on the fridge, I'm going to put drawings and homework on my blog.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/185262659594298

See, I can be useful.

Mid-Course Note on "Ninja Writing" by Shani Raja

Shani, you made my put my pencil down. When I'm taking courses it's my tendency to to write down or sketch too many things just to help me concentrate, but it doesn't feel like I have to here. I am taking notes here and there for highlights, but otherwise just listening and engaging in the exercises. Thank you for sharing this, I'm taking my time and really enjoying this course.

June 30, 2020

"Anti-Maskers" --yes, that's a new word.

Lately I have felt bad for neglecting the Nature Nimbus environmental blog. I haven't published anything in ages, without updating that the reason is that I have repurposed that time towards sewing masks.

They say "actions speak louder than words" but also that "the pen is mightier than the sword". In conclusion I have often felt conflicted and am just playing this by ear.

That said, there is something that I'm finally getting the courage to say:

Dear Anti-Maskers:

As much as I'd rather you did, I won't force you to wear a mask. But don't be mean about it.

You have no idea how long I've been waiting to get that off my chest.

Again, thank you Mr. Raja for the emboldening via Ninja Writing. They say "the pen is mightier than the sword" and this course is giving me courage to fight back.

The boy who called "sheep"

I understand there are people with asthma, and people with other illnesses that makes wearing a mask viscerally terrifying to them. So instead, they create extra physical distance and only shop in stores that do not require wearing a mask.

But I'm not talking about them.

You know the ones I'm talking about. The ones that get all hot and loud about the cloth on your face.

The way some anti-maskers respond you'd think they were being told to seal plastic bags around their heads.

I understand the fear or even tantrum of a child being told they're getting a needle; but it would be insincere of me to say I truly understand the fear anti-masker.

But remember this:

If you hold too tightly to your freedom you may break it. You may make it crumble and slip through your fingers in an effort to prevent anyone else from touching it, but by your own reaction destroy what you claim to protect.

And then one day, that may come back to you in ways you can no longer even fight. If someone you love catches this and they catch it bad, your freedom won't save them.

Do not be greedy with your freedom.