Who is going to steal my comments now?

Challenges are rocks in the river. They interrupt our daily flow, and they may even make us turbulent, but we keep flowing around them.

At around 6:30pm tonight in Toronto we just saw a comet disappear into the unknown colour, west-north-west, chasing the sun.

(The colour is green purple orange blue. Grey. Mermaid-coloured.)

posted 2019-10-29

I wonder if the average height of university students is greater than the average height of (community) college students.
posted 2019-10-29

Anxiety is not being able to stop wondering if she person who shifted over to make room for you heard you say thank you.

Challenges are rocks in the river. They interrupt our daily flow, but we keep flowing around them.

But if there are too many, it can make us very turbulent.

(posted 2021-04-09)

Remember, even the worst week of your life can only last seven days.

Cafe making

Having trouble being productive with your homework? Want to do your work at a cafe but don't want to spend money on cafe snacks?

Life hack: make muffins, brew some tea, and and put BGM on in the background

2022-04-06 edit: Oh no the youtube video is gone. I'm pretty sure it was this album:

Rainy Jazz ~Relaxing Jazz Radio~ by Cafe Music BGM Channel

https://music.apple.com/ca/album/rainy-jazz-relaxing-jazz-radio/1372037948

I used this as the background music for an origami party before, and it set the most perfect mood for a perfect day.

Yesterday I took a couple old bus routs I haven't taken in a while. It was good to be reminded. To remember how it feels to be scared like that, and of what many girls feel all the time still.

For a while I had forgotten why I used to wear a fake wedding band, and felt silly over it. Yesterday I found myself in a situation where once again I was trying to discreetly move my ring to the left ring finger again.

The Water You Don't Have to Run Through

"Privileged" is a relative term. Personally I don't consider privileged as necessarily being born into unfair advantage, or something that you shouldn't have. It's about not being born into a situation of inherent disadvantage.

Think of it this way: we all have to run through an obstacle course. This is life. We could choose different paths with different obstacles we may or may not know about. But there's a catch: Some people are forced to run the all spaces between the same obstacles, but through water. The amount of water you don't have to run through is the amount of privilege you have.

If you were born into a situation where you end up with struggles totally outside your control; being a minority, having chronic physical or mental illness, that's not a one-time obstacle you can just push to overcome one and for all, is a struggle that affects literally everything you do.

Some people care and some people don't. But even if you're a selfish person, are you also stupid is my question.

You don't know who of these people you'll need to be at their potential someday. Who has the monly mind that could come up with a cure for an incurable disease you're going to have someday, who will be able to help save your family from a disaster, to talk one of your friends off an edge. You don't know who you'll need to help you, where they are now, or what only they can do for you or your loved ones that all the money in the world cannot buy.

Edited 2019-10-25

Feet on the Mountains

October 24, 2019, posted Jan 5, 2020

I am picturing a red weather balloon

My mind is being crowded by the colour red.

I have a very slow-brew creative process. It can take years even for me to figure out how to express something, and that "ah-ha" moment could just pop up at any time, even when I'm supposed to be doing or thinking about something else.

~~

I'm envious of people who can so easily lead with Ne, and can just sit down and brainstorm, and access and develop their ideas so quickly.

For me even brainstorming is too organized. It's more like a brain-webbing, where different ideas have an undercurrent connecting them and making them flow into eachother somehow because as much as I might call something a "new idea", it usually takes me a little while to really stop thinking about a theme.

A lot of people have not been loved enough.

"I want to live like an island person."

Why is "tongue" spelled that way. Or "eight". Or "phenolpthalein." "Colonel".

No matter how you pronounce it this doesn't make sense. sieves seevs sivs

A fine line

There is a fine line between what people consider unique or “exotic” vs what they consider weird.

A fine line between “often seen”, and boring.

~~

I do hate certain parts of human nature. But I don’t hate humans. I hardly even dislike people, just certain things we do sometimes.

There are also things we do sometimes that I do like.

Q: What's something that makes you uncomfortable to think of?

A: Swimming in butter.

Posted 2020-05-29

A field book log (Instead of speaking to you in poetry I started having to speak to you in lab report...)

Instead of speaking to you in poetry I started having to speak to you in lab report.

A collection of letters becomes a field book. Just state the facts. Be perfectly accurate. Don’t erase, don’t scribble anything out; strike through only. Always use a ruler. 

From flowing, verbal sketches to having to include every (clarifying) detail, and instead of painting a pretty picture or making a unique and special picture with words, I become a black and white printer.

I don’t want to just be right right according to political definitions. I want to do and to speak right by my own conscience. 

Sunset Progression Throwback

Two years ago:

Minor car accident

I just wish there was someone, anyone else here who would just say "at least you guys didn't die" or something.
     Everything is "oh no the new car" and "oh no the insurance."
     How about at least the only injury that occurred at all is I have a bit of a sore back, and headache from the mild concussion from earlier this week is worse. Though I'm pretty sure that's just from the talking.

     This morning I called Grandma and told her what happened.
     She said "at least nobody got hurt. It could have gone a lot worse."
     She's the best.

"I'm having the time of my life here.

To clarify, I mean the worst time of my whole life."

(I'm not really. Just thought it sounded funny :P)

'Family'

I look around the subway. No babies or young children. Chances are, at some point each and every person on this train has wished they were better-looking.

Nobody here needs to wish that.

Make your own happiness.