The peace of God that excels all understanding...

 "Do not be anxious over anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication along with thanksgiving, let your petitions be made known to God; and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your mental powers by means of Christ Jesus." - Philippians 4:6,7

      It can be said that I now personally understand the "surpasses all understanding" part of that peace on a new level from what I did before. 

      In its own respective way every answer seems more beautiful than the last, or maybe I should say in its own way each answer is incredibly beautiful.

      I keep going, "just, wow." Which is such a strange, stumped-sounding thing to say.

      But it can also be said that while life has left me in disbelief in a horrible way many times, in brilliant and wonderful moments God keeps leaving me in disbelief of the depth of his love.

      (And in some moments, of the love that can be reflected by others and indirectly, as well. The way I heard a friend say it before was likening reflecting God's love, like the glass on the moon reflects the light of the sun. It may not be so big and powerful, but together creates a beautiful and brilliant glow in the night sky. I really appreciate others who reflect that love, too 🤍)

~~

Also this is a bit more random, but this reminds me of something a different friend shared with me.

      At the time I was in very extreme fresh grief.

      I had actually come to strongly resent the image of a candle, being used on my friend's memorial page and on a support forum I was on. It seemed so flimsy, how could we possibly face this immense darkness with just a little candle?

      And then my friend shared this with me: that God's hope is not like a mere candle, but rather it is like the warm and brilliant rays of the morning sun, lighting up our lives.

      I will probably continue to keep most private by default, but I want to put this down here. So many times God showed he heard me in the most comforting, strengthening, genuine ways. 

      Words fall short, and I just cannot thank him enough.