Something I Resent / If He Was a Girl, Would he be a Nice Girl?

Girls told to especially watch out for other girls who are insecure.

We are warned that even if they seem nice at first, insecure girls will very often be fake, jealous, and try to tear you down and use you.

But when does anyone say, "watch out for insecure boys"? In fact, if anything many girls are told to try to understand and support them regardless of their behaviour.

Women: do not neglect to fear the insecure adult man the way you were once taught to fear insecure little girls.

And be warned, one insecure man is likely to pose much greater danger to you than every insecure girl you have ever met. Many horrifying statistics that will back this up.

Domestic abuse. Shooters.

It's true schoolgirls do kill eachother sometimes. 

But how often do men kill their wives, girlfriends, and mothers? How often do teenage boys kill their teachers and schoolmates?

It's the same nightmare, yeet from a young age girls are taught a dangerous double standard that if a girl is a certain way she shouldn't put herself in the line of fire like that, don't sacrifice yourself for her, but if it's a man she is dating she should.

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A more positive spin that I forgot to post, for advice for women co sundering being with a man:

If he was a girl, would he be a nice girl? 

You'll probably say yes.

(You probably say that about majority of women.)

But take note of this: even though you think she is nice, would something tell you to be slightly cautious, just in case? Even if it makes you feel a bit superficial and you do like her and see a lot of good in her, would a part of you reserve a bit of caution?

If the answer to this last question is "yes", do not ignore that.

This is a question can help you override sexist biases programmed into you since you were young, and could save you from internal misogyny tricking you into the worst decision of your life.

And the further, potentially scariest part for some of you is this:

If your answer to the question, "if he was a girl, would he be a genuinely nice girl?" is straight up "no", no matter how much you don't want to hear this I am telling you this means he is not a nice man.

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If you are not sure though and you are thinking of a guy you are dating right now, consider asking him additional questions inspired by this me talk exercise of if he were a girl: if he were a girl, what would he dress like? What would he do in his spare time? Would he have chosen different education?

Anything that you have a better understanding of intuitively for women even if you can't always articulate why, can open up conversations that could be valuable for you.

Because another thing is even if a girl you meet is very insecure, perhaps a shy, underappreciated underdog, you may still be cautioned to prepare yourself for a potential outcome that she may someday come to resent or turn on you.

It doesn't mean she will, and many of those girls won't and instead they go on to be your best friend forever.

But when you are considering making a man your best friend forever, do not think you are as lost in being able to intuitively discern things than society will have you beleive.

And as I've said before and I'll say again, just like with a girl: if intuitively you get the strange feeling that something is a little off, please know that the validity of that feeling, your intuition, is *not* contingent on your ability to articulate why to anyone else, even yourself.